Day 3 Post Op

July 23, 2013 is a day that will forever be a part of yet another thing that has shaped me into who I am and will become.

On July 22, we got another call from Mayo Clinic around 6am, my husband was getting up and ready for work and I was trying to sleep in:) They were calling to tell me they had a match and that this was a very young donor and they felt confident that this would be IT. Now, last time they called me, back in June, I was a total wreck. I was emotional and scared and not really sure of what was about to take place. This time I was calm and did not really have any expectations..because I had been called before and sent home, so I didn’t want to assume this was the real deal. We drove to Jacksonville and arrived around 1pm, and went through the prepping process again and played the waiting game. We were given several different approximate times for surgery and they all were dependent on the cross match test. This is a 4hr test they conduct after they procure it from the donor, that will show if my cells attack the pancreas or not.

While we waited I was not able to eat or drink anything, had to have an enema…worst thing ever! And just laid around praying that this wasn’t all for nothing again. My parents arrived around 5pm and we were thinking that the surgery was going to start around 10pm. The time passed and I was tired and anxious all at the same time, finally the nurse came in around 11ish and said the crossmatch was good and we were scheduled to begin surgery in about an hour.

Now…SOOOO many people have asked questions about how I felt and if I remember what happened etc. I have a VERY good memory, especially photographic memory and can remember explicit details of a place or room down to a T..so to answer the question..”do you remember anything?” The answer would be yes, with the exception of the time I was in under during surgery.

I remember the Dr came into my room with a nurse to get me and take me to surgery. I had my face in my hands and was halfway asleep because I had a migraine from not eating all day. By this time it was 1:20am and the start time was blown..:) I jumped up like I was rushing to a fire, didn’t even say anything to my husband or my parents…..almost as if they weren’t there. Sounds awful I know, but at the time I was in a state of sleepiness and shock. I remember coming into the operation room and there about 15 nurses and doctors in that room and my first thought was..”why in the world are so many people in here.” Dr. Wilingaham greeted me from a far corner by saying “Hey Natalie, welcome, I am playing with you r new pancreas so forgive me, I’ll be right there.” He was truly a great Dr. They got me on the table and began poking and talking and poking and talking and soon enough I was OUT! Surgery began at 2:17am.

I was not awake for the placement of the PIC line in my neck..thank goodness! The next thing I remember is waking up in recovery, it was almost like a movie scene, where there are nurses everywhere around a patient or emergency victim, they were all talking and grabbing stuff, moving me this way and that way. I was crying, I felt as if I were dying, the pain was unbearable. I remember telling them I hated this and I just wanted everything to go back to the way it was and to please just let me die if I was going to die anyway. One nurse was laughing at me and kept reassuring me that I wasn’t dying and that I was in recovery and did great. I was begging for my mom so I could tell her goodbye and at that moment I remember feeling very alone. I asked one of the many nurses to please hold my hand, and she willingly did so and rubbed my head and told me I was doing great and they were giving me more pain meds to just hang tight. Her talking to me is the last thing I remember until I woke up in my room with my mom and Brandon (my hubby).

While I was in surgery Dr. Willingham called Brandon periodically to let him know how everything was going and at one point he informed him he had to take my appendix out in order to make the pancreas fit in my frame and how it should be. I remember asking to see my incision and was worried about looking like a freak show. I had been looking at scars and models of the incision on the internet for months ..which I don’t advise anyone to do if you’re preparing for something like this, and had myself thinking I was going to look like a Frankenstien baby! Fortunately Dr. Willingham did not have to cut me as much, nor did he have to use staples, which is normal procedure, he was able to use regular stitches because I was small and the weight would not pull at the incision:) So that’s a plus!!

I was not able to eat or drink anything for 48hr, and to be honest, I didn’t feel like eating ever again. The days were spent learning about the new pancreas and how to take care of it and avoid the possibility of rejection. I was released from the hospital on July 27…which was AMAZING considering they told me from day 1 that the normal stay time is 7-10 days and possibly longer.

We were released from Mayo but were still required to stay in Jacksonville for at least 4 weeks post op. So we found a monthly rental and set up “house”:) I was at the Clinic almost everyday for the first 2 weeks for labs, and doctor appointments to make sure all my levels were ok and that I was doing well with the antirejection meds,  because they have some pretty severe side effects. After the 2 weeks I was at clinic maybe 2-3x a week until I was released.
Since being home I have some genuine people and friends willing and able to help us out and offer to help in any way. God has truly blessed us with each one of these people and continues to show Himself even when I think I am ok and no longer need help, He is there to remind me that I have people who want to help and to just let them. I am getting back to normal, if that’s possible and am ready to head back to work. I will update you guys a little more with details and answer any questions you may have. I have had lots of questions and inquisitive minds want to know a little more detail:) If you have anything you’re dying to know, I don’t mind answering:) There is a reason for this “season” in my life and I will continue to praise Him for the gift I am so undeserving of, I will continue to pray for strength for the family who lost their loved one so that I could live a healthy life with my family and see my kids grow up, I will continue to beg and plead with God to please help us find a cure for Type 1 and of course I will continue to fight for a cure and cannot wait til the day its found! Thank you all for your support, prayers, kind words, gifts and love! We love you all!

Natalie